How can great news lead to a writing dilemma?
Last night uVme announced a new marketing plan with some great new features.
And one of these new features has given rise to a personal dilemma.
I am struggling with the sentence:
"Even if you never sign up an affiliate in your life you will earn a recurring income over 8 levels!"
My dilemma, and maybe it's because I have not had my first morning cup of coffee yet, has to do with the message that this sentence conveys to the reader. It can give rise to the expectation of something-for-nothing and get-rich-quick, whereas I want to get across the strength of what we offer.
I have no difficulty expressing it with more words, e.g.
"As a team we have a build-deep strategy, which we achieve by continuing to place new associates deep in our growing multilevel organisation, instead of building a wide organisation. And it is an unfortunate reality that many associates, no matter how hard they work, struggle for a long time before they sign up their first associate.
One of the features that I love about our new marketing plan, which was announced last night, is that these struggling associates now have the opportunity to earn a recurring income. Even if they do not sign up an associate of their own, as the team continues to build deep, they will earn our so-called generation income over 8 levels."
This is great news for everyone who would like a taste of success in multilevel marketing, because once they taste this success, their enthusiasm is going to lead them to further success.
So can you help me out of my dilemma?
I need a short phrase/sentence that conveys the combined strength of:
- our team's adopted strategy to work together and to "build deep", plus
- the 8 level generation income for which every associate qualifies
- the 8 level generation income for which every associate qualifies
without giving rise to the something-for-nothing or get-rich-quick associations.
Words are a powerful instrument, and for once I can't seem to come up with the right wording.
Your feedback would be much appreciated.
Enjoy and good luck!
Inaki
PS. Feel free to use the comment form below and TOP IT box above :-)
Comments (8)
No longer an active ...
12
Thanks Brian.
What you have written reads like a mission statement which is what peaceful recommended in his comment. Let's see what others have to say about it.
No longer an active ...
12
I just received a flow of constructive feedback by email.
Absolutely brilliant guys and gals.
Take a look at the hugely improved "Ads by user" above.
Click on it to see the improved lead capture page.
You have all done a great job of clearing my writer's block.
Many thanks and feel free to copy the results.
No longer an active ...
12
Thanks guys for your helpful feedback, including emails.
The improved text is now on display.
Jeff Greene
8
Online Marketing Specialist/Consultant
Writing a short Mission Statement will often help...
Try this resource:
http://www.ehow.com/how_7485_write-mission-statement.html
Clifford Griffin
3
Hello Inaki,
Clifford Griffin here. This will take some thought. I'll have something for you tomorrow.
Kindest Regards,
Clifford Griffin
Diana Harvey
6
entrepreneur
Hi Inaki,
In work,play and success United we stand.
Regards Di