Couples Treatment: What to Expect from the Therapist

Couples' therapy is a very worthy process of being able to mend and cement marriages. However, to many couples, the idea of having a therapist may somewhat be intimidating. Knowing what a therapist does takes some restraint off and may give you an expectation of the sessions. This article shall guide how therapists add to couples' therapy to help couples work towards better relationships.

Why Couples Seek Therapy

Issues vary upon which couples begin seeking treatment; however, perhaps the most common complaints bringing couples into treatment concern issues like: communications, trust, and betrayals-infidelity; relentless conflicts; feelings of detachment; and sexual problems. Couples' therapy identifies problems at the heart of the couples' conflicts and often helps the couple learn to work together in order to eliminate those problems. Many couples go for therapy not because they have problems but as a precaution-so, imagine when transitioning into marriage, having a child, or even changing your location. The therapy in such times helps them learn communication and conflict resolution skills that would help them handle the issues at hand.

Couples Therapy: The Therapist's Position

A licensed, certified professional, he or she can assume the position of a neutral third party in relationship issues. The central role of the couple's therapist is to train both parties involved in a relationship to develop healthier attachment types and to communicate with each other better. Here's what one might possibly expect from the therapist during couples therapy:

1. Establishment of a Non-critical, Safe Environment

Above all, the therapist has to create a secure environment that is non-judgmental in nature, where elevation of voices is allowed and respected. A relationship in its very nature encompasses emotional vulnerabilities, and couples may come for treatment with feelings of defensiveness or hurt. The therapist provides an arena whereby one partner can express their views and feelings openly and freely without being judged; this allows both partners equal opportunity to be heard.

2. Free Flow of Communication

Communication problems are among the major issues in distressed relationships. The therapist points to the self-destructive patterns of communication that exist, such as criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling, that need to be changed, and teaches healthier modes of talking with each other. This would include active listening, empathy, and ways of expressing one's needs without blaming the partner. By reframing negative statements into positive or constructive ones, the therapist deflates defenses and opens the door to more fruitful conversations.

3. Getting to the Root of Conflicts

Though the specific issues may be presenting problems for therapy, such as finances or intimacy, a professional digs deeper to find the emotional triggers. More often than not, what looks like conflict is actually unmet emotional needs, insecurities, or traumas of the past. This helps the therapist to fathom these deeper issues so that couples may address their problems right at the root instead of having surface-level arguments.

4. Problem-Solving Skills

After these underlying issues have been identified, therapists help the couples find better ways of solving problems and resolving conflicts. Examples may include taking time-outs during arguments, learning to compromise, or using non-defensive communication. Evidence-based approaches, such as EFT and CBT, further educate the couple on how to break the negative interaction cycles and establish better ways of communicating.

5. Neutrality and Non-judgment

A good therapist never takes sides against an individual in a conflict. He never is to pass judgment on who is "right" and who is "wrong," as he is there to facilitate understanding and healing. Even in those instances when one partner may have been entirely at fault, the therapist works to help them understand how the dynamics contributed to the problem and how they can move forward together.

Monitoring Progress and Goal Evaluation

It is true that couples therapy is invariably tailored to meet the needs of the couple. The initial stages of couples therapy would include an attempt to clearly state the treatment goals with the couple-for example, to improve communication or rebuild trust. The therapist will go on monitoring further into the progress of the couple and will change their approach as necessary, allowing them to work toward those goals. Homework assignments might include even practices of a certain communication technique one might be learning in therapy or the keeping of a journal throughout the process to ensure a couple is, in fact, getting better outside of the four walls of a therapy session.

What to Expect During Sessions

Sessions are approximately 50 to 60 minutes long. Early sessions are set aside to collect background information about the history of the couple; subsequent sessions will be used for the specific topics presented, along with practice of the new skills learned. Sometimes personal problems that affect the marriage/relationship will require individual therapy along with couple's therapy.

Conclusion

During couples therapy, the therapist acts more as a guide, facilitator, and teacher for them. Firstly, the therapist reassures them of their safety, and then the therapist helps the clients improve their communication and make them understand what exactly creates conflicts between them.